Possessed Business: Orange Jordan

The inspiration for this post can be traced back to Jad. Thanks, Jad!

Dear Orange Jordan, I have had it with you. You’re like some bad boyfriend who takes my money but refuses to deliver on the important things in life, such as rubbing my feet, or, in your case, LETTING ME USE MY GODDAMN INTERNET.

Let me tell you something, Orange Jordan, the cheap-ass internet connection I utilize whenever I’m in Kiev, Ukraine? The one that costs LESS THAN HALF of what I pay in Amman? Amazingly enough, it only breaks down, oh, maybe once every couple of months. At most. You, meanwhile, flash that little red light on my router nearly every day. Sometimes, you flash that little red light for hours. It is monstrous, that little red light – it’s an eye of a dragon, it’s a drop of unrighteous blood, it’s like a ZOMBIE staring at me through the keyhole.

Do you know how heartbreaking it is to see that little world icon on my internet status widget disappear? Do you know what it feels like to wait for it to come back? It’s like trying to chase after a freaking unicorn – do you even dare hope? Most of the time, I don’t.

Your JOKE of a support service, Orange Jordan, reminds me of interacting with half-drunk relatives at Christmas. If anything you say does, for a moment, make sense, it merely plunges me into despair. I don’t want to hear about your numerous issues, Orange Jordan, and I certainly don’t want these issues to become my issues.

I just want my GODDAMN CONNECTION BACK, so that I can edit other people’s articles and stalk famous people on Twitter in peace.

4 thoughts on “Possessed Business: Orange Jordan

  1. If Orange Jordan don’t immediately sack their entire management team out of sheer guilt at this flood of eloquence, I’ll eat my hat.

    Did I say ‘hat’? I meant ‘cheese sandwich’. Orange UK are my mobile phone supplier, and you’ve seen for yourself how reliable [bitter laughter] that service is.

  2. I totally disagree with you!
    Orange Jordan has been the most stable internet provider in Jordan since day one. I have tried and had subscriptions with Orange (Wanadoo), Batelco (Omniah), TE Data, Wi-Tribe and some other i forgot their name! Orange connection was and still is the most dependable, steady and the best there is out here. It could be because everyone else have to use the Orange exchanges, lines, Hashem 1 sat station and FLAG connection to the world and Orange “control” these!
    As for their tech support, that is another story, they are cooperative IF YOU CAN EVER REACH THEM!! The phones are always busy and cut you off instead of allowing you to wait! If by any chance you get someone on the phone, then you can be sure their level of knowledge (tech-wise) is about as deep as that of a college freshman!
    Cool it off and please be fair, people read your writings so be careful.

  3. Ammar, I don’t quite understand how it is “unfair” to relate one’s personal experiences with a given company. If you’ve had it easy with Orange, good for you. That hasn’t been my experience, and this is what I have spoken about here. I’m not really sure why you’re instructing me to be “careful” either – what is it exactly that’s careless about saying “these have been my experiences with this business”? I think that if I was doing some sort of study on consumer satisfaction with Orange and not, say, figuring in other people’s positive experiences with their service, then you’d have a point.

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