Happy Birthday, Dear Vladimir
13 is a funny age to be. When I was 13, I wore a lot of black, for example.
You, my dear “Volvo”, are different from me, but your Sweet 13 is no less funny. You’re living in a funny time. In a funny country. And the way you handle it already proves that you have more grace than I could ever hope for.
On your 13th birthday, and the advent of teenagedom, I wish for you an easier time in your studies. I hope that you encounter subjects and books that can really get your attention. I hope you continue your fascinating musical journey, from T.I. to Ratatat, and not forget your own musical talents in the process. I heard that mom and dad got you a guitar this year. Treat it as a sign from up high. ;
Look both ways when you cross the street. For every time that you don’t, you STILL owe me a ghrivna.
Be safe. Be lucky. Be healthy.
Be good to yourself. Know that you are loved.
I love you – I love the cheese omelets you make, I love how you tell jokes, I love your fierce loyalty and growing independence, I love how you have the most hilarious picture of me ever framed above your desk, I love how you have the best ringtones, I love how you get modern theater, I love hanging out with you downtown and wish we could do it more often, I love how you have your own inner world that not just anyone gets a peek at, I even love how you slam your door and blast Linkin Park.
I love that I have you with me in this world. Even though I’m mostly far away these days – your presence makes the distances a little smaller, and the steep Amman hills a little flatter.
Big up from Big Butt! And three cheers to you on your birthday.
Amusing Facebook Koinkidink
From two friends who, as far as I can tell, do NOT know each other:
Like Joe, I am so very meta right now.
Oh for God’s sake, Jessica Simpson is not freaking “fat”
Let me first say that I generally object to all dissections of famous people’s weight gains and losses. I have to be realistic and say that one hand, this sort of thing is inevitable, but on the other hand – maybe if we had a slightly more inclusive beauty standard, it wouldn’t happen so often.
I am personally really tired of the slightly androgynous, petite, zero jiggle beauty standard that is currently meant to define “classy” or “fashionable.” I’m not saying that there aren’t women who totally rock that look – but come on. Some people just shouldn’t try to fit into that mould to begin with, but are told that they have to. The truth is, it doesn’t work for everyone, and its exclusivity doesn’t make it more appealing, just boring, because people who ought to know better are nattering on about how fabulous it is. At this point, it’s like hearing some twelve-year-old talk about how “awesome” Nickelback are. It’s been done, over and over again. If I was twelve, I would have been right there too. But I’m not twelve, and society must mature with me, dammit.
You know what? I hated it when Angelina Jolie was shown as having dropped at least a size in “Wanted.” It. Didn’t. Work. For. Her. Notice, I’m not calling her a “waif” or sneering about how she should have eaten a cheeseburger. What I am saying is that with her face and body structure, or, actually, divinely-inspired architecture, you need a little oomph and fat. If your body is not meant to weight 120 pounds, it will cry out in protest. And the strain will be visible to all.
I’m not even going to attempt to dig into all of the class and race issues surrounding body weight that we all carry around in our collective beauty culture. I still remember how Cindy Crawford was quoted at being amazed, and not in an especially positive way, that J. Lo could flaunt her decently sized butt like she did. Am not saying that Cindy’s racist (I kind of heart Cindy), but how long is it going to take people to catch on that, hey, it’s not a one-size-fits-all, and not everyone finds the skinny, granite-like supermodel ass attractive, and that it’s OK?
I know what many of you are going to say – “but Natalia, why not do away with beauty standards altogether?” Continue reading “Oh for God’s sake, Jessica Simpson is not freaking “fat””
An Important Event for Feminism: Renegade Evolution & Top Feminist Blogs
So this week, something cool happened, and this something cool was the revelation that Renegade Evolution is in the Top 30 Feminist Blogs, according to statistics.
I consider Ren a good friend, so a congratulations of a personal nature is in order. Yay! Squee! And so on.
But what makes this particular inclusion so special – other friends of mine are on the list as well, including the lovely Daisy – is that Ren’s blog is the blog of a sex-worker: sometimes caustic, sometimes scary, often embattled, and always straight-up and honest.
I know that some people reading this right now are going “whatever. You’re just happy that Ren was included because she perpetuates the myth of the Happy Hooker. And that myth allows you to sleep at night. Jerk.”
Of all the people I know, Ren is among those who are least likely to sugarcoat anything. I don’t believe in sugarcoating when it comes to this subject either – especially as it pertains to things like trafficking, et cetera. But I also believe that the real reason why Ren is accused of being a liar and a shill is because one of the main ideas behind her blog is that sex-work first needs to be a choice, and a safe choice at that.
What she doesn’t say is that sex-work everywhere must be wiped out. Neither does she say things like “well, it’s all horrible, but I’m a realist, so let’s make it as safe as we can first and then worry about getting rid of it.” No. She likes her job. And that grates on people in a big way.
Most often, people who attack Ren and her blog point to any number of truly distressing blogs and/or negative accounts of women in sex-work and say: “Do you see? This is the REALITY that Ren is trying to deny.” Or else they say, “Ren’s the minority anyway, why should she count?”Continue reading “An Important Event for Feminism: Renegade Evolution & Top Feminist Blogs”
Natalia A. 